One of the first things I did when I moved to Chicago was proceed to Barnes & Noble to pick up the Chicago Zagat Guide. This little booklet has been my guide to navigating eateries around the city. I immediately noticed that the top-ranked restaurant was Alinea… just a short 4-5 block walk from my apartment.
“Visionary” chef Grant Achatz is “back in full swing” after a much publicized health scare and offers an “adventure in amazement” at this Lincoln Park “gastronomic theater for all five senses”, rated No. 1 for Food in Chicago (and maybe “the world”) thanks to “delicate”, “witty” New American dishes (some “come with instructions” and “creative tableware”) exhibiting “staggering” “innovation”; a “flawless”, “surprisingly unpretentious” staff (ranked No. 1 for service), “thoughtful wine pairings” and ‘quiet, minimalist” surroundings are more reasons why “anyone who cares about food” “must visit” – just brace for “astronomically expensive” tabs.
Oh how I longed to dine here! But of course the four dollar signs on the Yelp! review stopped me.
Fast forward eight months. My good friend Tiffany is in town to visit for Presidents Day weekend. Coincidentally Valentines Day also falls on this weekend. Tiffany’s bf in Toronto, and me, single as can be… we decide to treat ourselves out on Friday night. We narrow restaurants down to our top two, and when the other restaurant can’t accept reservations until 10pm, we decide to take the plunge and dine at Alinea.
My summary and review follows. [We are disappointed to report that we were too chicken to pull out our camera for each of these 12 dishes around such sophisticated people, so we only snuck the iPhone out in only a few instances.]
The 12-course tasting menu is advertised at $145. The wine pairings were HIGHLY recommended (perhaps a bit pushy) and start at 70% the price of the meal. We decide what the heck, we’ll take that too… might as well complement the food we’re paying so much for anyway… No menu was presented, just an inventory of any food allergies and preferences. Each dish comes with a mini story.
A dish of two butters arrive to stay for the savory dishes. One is a goat’s milk butter and the other is a Wisconsin butter topped with Hawaiian black salt. A new piece of bread is brought with each dish.
Course 1: Char Roe - The chef has struck a friendship with a Native American tribe in Washington that is permitted to harvest this very special roe. The roe is harvested, sent overnight to Grand Rapids, MI where’s Chef’s friend cures the roe. Because it is custom cured, it is not too salty like other roe you may have had before. This is served with flavors of parsnip, licorice, ginger, and a giant mystery ball the size of a fisheye that I think is also roe. This dish is accompanied by a delicious glass of champagne that I wish I could have drunk all night. The giant mystery ball ends up being a maple syrup ball that is also made by the friend in Grand Rapids in his own oak barrels. This dish is light, the flavors complement one another well and just the right size.
Course 2: Cauliflower - One of Chef’s favorite vegetables is cauliflower. However this little gem of a vegetable is not highly appreciated, so he has developed a dish that “disguises” cauliflower. It is cauliflower puree in little cubes covered in 5 different coatings that range from almond to caraway to ham and cheese, accompanied by 3 gels that range in spices, surrounded by an apple soup.

Course 2 : "Cauliflower"
Course 3: Wild Stripe Bass - A sheet made of chamomile tea is the base of this dish comprised of poached striped bass, shellfish, shellfish-flavored sauce and shaved celery. Unique and aromatic, we were amazed at the sheet of chamomile. We hypothesized that gelatin is used but later overhear that it is actually egg-white. My personal opinion: smells interesting but didn’t taste too great. The fish was cooked perfectly, but I think I wasn’t a fan of all that concentrated mystery shellfish flavor. Nor that chamomile.
After this dish, an addition was made to our table centerpiece. We were told to not touch it as it will shatter before our eyes. ”Keep an eye on it as the night progresses, and it will reveal itself.”

Centerpieces
Course 4: Lobster - Served on a really cool wavy plate, the corn is highlighted in this dish. Several pieces of lobster is layered atop a mixture of corn two ways, popped and curried. The cube in the middle is a mango puree to complement the flavors of curry. The server called our attention to the big ball on the right. That is a ball of liquefied butter for the lobster. He got a few laughs when he suggested holding the piece of toast he provided as a shield when poking the ball with your fork. Oh yes – that white ribbon? That’s POPCORN puree. Yum! This dish was delicious and hearty and ends up being one of my top 2. Yum yum yum.

Course 4: "Lobster"
Course 5: Iberico Ham - A plate with roasted salsify roots and some greens comes out. The server takes the meaty centerpieces and identify them as Iberico Ham, laid them atop the salsify and topped with a sprinkle of black pepper.
Course 6: Wagyu Beef - A piece of real Wagyu beef (server says better than Kobe beef) seasoned lightly and cooked to perfection comes with a packet containing “powdered A-1″ (there are flavors of tamarind and anchovy to name a few), it is served with a green and a crunchy/creamy potato/chips mixture. Finally, some spiced water is added to the strange black container (seen in “centerpieces” photograph). We learn that the container contained dry ice and the water smells of smokiness, thyme and other spices that are supposed to simulate a backyard bbq. Waft and eat quickly. YUM — my other favorite dish of the night. The beef MELTS in my mouth and the dish disappears mere seconds after the waiter walks away. Truly not enough time to get the camera out to take a shot.
Course 7: Hot Potato - A tiny little wax bowl carried out by our charmingly awkward and jittery server (whom I develop a mini crush on) holds some hot cream of potato soup. A metal toothpick is pierced through the wax carrying a ball of cold potato and seasonings and topped with a black truffle. The idea is to pull the toothpick and quickly throw the mixture back like a shot so to get the full effect of hot/cold in this dish.

Course 7: "Hot Potato"
Course 8: Chestnut - Acting as the transition dish between savory and sweet, this savory/savory dish was a bit of both. Comes in a clear glass tube is layers of hazelnut cream, quince, bittersweet chocolate, baked potato ice cream, and a smoky foam. The dish was explained and then the tube was lifted and the contents were spilled into the bowl.
Course 9: Yogurt - Served in a shot glass is a white chocolate ball in a bit of pomegranate juice and topped with a mint. Throw it back, but be careful, the glass is an optical illusion (the white chocolate ball is bigger than you think) and remember to close your mouth because that ball will pop!
Course 10: Spice Cake - A warm persimmon spice cake is served with hazelnut ice cream, candied carrots, a tarragon chip and a ball of Myer’s rum. Either pop it to soak the cake… or Chef suggested to pop the Myer’s rum ball in your mouth and take it like a shot to cleanse the pallette.

Course 10: "Spice Cake"
Course 11: Chocolate - A sheet of chocolate covering preserved prunes and olives comes with a scoop of PINE ice cream (it tastes like a pine tree!) atop cookie crumbles and a pool of sweet pine nut soup. Mix and match as you please and enjoy.

Course 11: "Chocolate"
Course 12: Sweet Potato - The arrival of this highly anticipated dish was a bittersweet moment for us when this dish finally came out. We had been seeing it all night and were originally super excited about it, but after 11 courses and ~7 glasses of wine, we were just about pooped out. This is a smoldering cinnamon stick with a take on sweet potato pie on the end. The outside is deep fried and it is flavored with bourbon and brown sugar. You pick it up and slide the sweet potato off in one smooth movement. No biting.

Course 12: "Sweet Potato"
At the end of the meal we were given personalized (because all tables’ meals varied slightly) menus with wines noted. Click to see full-sized image.
So… overall, it was a really fun experience. However, it took 4 hours, and I had to bail out on meeting a friend for a birthday outing because of it. Wow! 8-12:30. The flavors were amazing… so complex and complementary, I’ve never had a meal like this. I do wish that I didn’t take the wine pairing because my meal would have been way less expensive and I wouldn’t have gotten soooo incredibly full (or drunk) and almost unable to swallow the last bite. Good experience, but I will most likely never return to Alinea. I do believe those dollars spent could have gone more wisely elsewhere. Like towards towards this cool couch on sale at Crate and Barrel, or a plane ticket to LA.